...Er, um, Hello!

My name is Augustus. I have parents. Sometimes life can be difficult. I possess the great skill of being able to charm the socks off of anyone who chances to spot me, a rare occurrence indeed. [The spotting, that is; not the charming!]
However, for you, Dear Reader, I am prepared to divulge my deepest thoughts and perspective of the world, mostly because if I don't tell somebody what is going on around here, I am going to pop!
But be warned, proceed with caution: Living with Mummy and Dad can be rather harrowing at times...

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Hide and Speak


Does anyone know the rules of that thrilling game of intrigue known as Hide & Seek? 

I am wondering because Mummy says I haven’t quite got the hang of it. 
She says it is a game of secrecy which involves being quiet. I am sure I don’t know what she is talking about. 

Every now and then, Mummy will playfully chase me through the house until I discover a place I just know will be the ultimate hiding spot. Problem is Mummy always finds me! 

I can’t think how she does it. 

Take today for an instance:  
Running fast as I could away from Mummy, I slipped ‘round the corner into the guest bath and dove behind the shower curtain, glowing with confidence because she would never think to look for me in there. And as it seemed to be taking her forever [even better!], I began trilling to myself to pass the time. Next thing I know, she flings the shower curtain back and exposes me! 

I was astonished.

Is she, perhaps, using hidden cameras? Is she psychotic...er, psychic?
 I must get to the bottom of this if I am to win the game someday. 
I must discover her secret! 

I am going to ponder this deep mystery.

“Hum-de-hum-hum-de-hum tum tum…”

Thursday, September 20, 2012

JuSh’ a Li'l ‘niP’ll dO Ya!


*sniff…sniff*
*snifF…SniFF…sNIFF**
*SNIIIIIIFFFFFFF*
Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh…

Those wonderful dried herbs, those delightful crushed leaves from heaven~
I am a mad cat, running around in all directions – a positive Feline Frenzy!
Away I go, under the table…

*Screeeeech*

Did that chair just say something to me?
Take that!
*scratch, scuffle, scuffle*

Around the dining room, into the hall, back under the table like a flash I go…
I am falling over, kicking the air, scrAbblinG at a paSsing cat…Wazhn’t therE a CaT? My MishhtAke…
*hiccup*
I am suddenly relaxed, ovErwhelmed by a stRange sense of calM serEnity (izh that redUndant?)
RedoNe-whAt?

*giggle*

Rolling over, I sEe Other cats…thEy are uPsssHide down! I pAw At them lightly bUt tHey aRe sHo fAr…
mUmMy? wHy izH aShpEn pInK?

*SNIFF*

hoO-HOo…

~THisH ish grReEat sHtuff~

*hIcCup*

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Evidence!


Mummy is so busted!

She has been sneaking out onto the deck this past couple of weeks and spending too much time with Mithril, one of the outdoor cats. She thinks I don't notice but Mummy has also been spied carrying the One-Eyed Monster (aka digital camera) along for the excursions, and I, being the clever fellow that I am, have rummaged through her office and found the evidence of what I knew to be another disaster in the making –
viz. KITTENS!

Yep, we have newborn kittens in the vicinity, and I am hereby exposing Mummy's fell deeds of oohing and aahing over the little blighters on a consistent basis with intent to upset our happy home life.

Presenting Exhibit A, Mithril and Kits, born August 16, 2012.


As if Mosby and Morgan weren't bad enough....

Fuzzy intruders!

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

ThWaCk!


Down came the rolled-up magazine immediately behind, causing me to jump not a little and loosening my moorings from the marble tile. I gave Mummy a “What the devil?” look then turned in a circle to get a view of the crash site.

There must be some explanation, I thought. The obvious one aside (Mummy has gone mad) and desiring to extend the benefit of the doubt, surely there was some just cause for her paper-wielding outburst.
What I observed as Mummy raised the homemade swatter was a dazed but menacing-looking eight-legged creature who had apparently been stalking me unawares and who appeared still intent on his evil deed, providing he could first catch the license number of that truck.

 I was astonished!

To think that if Mummy had not been hanging around idly rolling up papers, I might have been an Arachnid Breakfast.

Or at the very least, my wild fur would have become a home for wayward spiders.

*sHudDeR*