Augustus In A Jamb

I am so embarrassed. This morning I was trying to get into the Forbidden Pantry when I got stuck – YES, STUCK! – between the doors. I usually have no trouble getting inside – I just pull and pull with my claws until a door swings outward (I won’t go into the lecture I recently got about the scratch marks at the base of the doors, both inside AND out); then I slip in, undetected.

Howver, I must have been a bit more sluggish than usual this time ‘cause the door slammed on me before I got my tummy through, and it knocked me sideways into the other door. Here, I was pinned at the hip so that I could not move forward or backward. I could only stare ahead at all those goodies that were now completely out of my reach. What’s worse, Mummy was outside watering her blighted trees and was of no help to me;  slowly everyone else began gathering around to watch the spectacle of Augustus pinned between two doors. And I am certain I heard someone snickering – probably Aspen!

I must have been there for hours when Mummy came in a few minutes later. And do you think she came to my rescue? Well, yes, eventually, but not before she had a hysterical laughing fit at my plight, watching me wiggle and squirm, my chubby legs scrabbling at the floor to no avail.  To add to my misery, she felt like using this as an object lesson for everyone: “See what happens to kitties that poke their noses where they don't belong?” She released me from my entanglement, and I scuttered off to sulk in some dank corner. I am going to have to speak to the management about those doors. And that Woman!