The Case of the Mysterious Moving Pillows

  

Mummy was cleaning house today, wildly moving things about in her quest to seek out and destroy all living dust bunnies (she was taking no prisoners). 

Now, I tend to look like a dust bunny when viewed from some angles and fear being mistaken for one at some point in my career, thus being swooped up and emptied into the dustbin along with various unidentifiable floor fauna.

So when The Monster comes out and Mummy has rag in hand, I seek refuge in the nearest shelter. 

This time it was the sofa.

On the sofa, there is a mountain of fluffy pillows. Oh so inviting, they can always be relied upon as a cozy spot for a nice nap, and in this instance I determined that they could serve multiple purposes – viz. both a great snoozely spot and the ideal hiding place.  Only, in order to kill two birds, as they say, with one stone…er, pillow…, I must needs be beneath them.

How else to disguise my fluffy self?

So I climbed Mt. Linen, hoping to find a convenient opening and so burrow my way in. Just as I stepped onto the last peak, however, the pillows shifted, causing me to slide down the hill.

Odd, that.

 Perhaps they were just a bit unsteady. I stepped up again and this time the pillows moved in an upward motion. I was astounded – a volcano on the couch!

The snarl of The Monster was getting closer, and these pillows were simply not cooperating.

Now attempting to gain entrance via one end, I started to push past the first pillow when up it came and bopped me on the nose.

This was too much!

I determined to not only secure my place beneath those rotten cotton squares but to tame them as well. Wiggling my lowered backside, I prepared for the Great Leap. As I sailed through the air with an aim to land on the crest of The Mountain, out bobbed the head of The Fiend Poppet! I became distracted by the sudden appearance of this feline in the mix and landed ruefully upside down among the foothills on the other side.

*blink, blink*

Untwisting my legs from my tail and righting myself, I asked Poppet if he, too, had seen the pillows moving. He merely sniffed then bounded off in the opposite direction, narrowly escaping the clutches of The Monster as he exited the room, leaving me to ponder the bizarre incident. Snatched back to reality by the intensified roar, I quickly determined to save myself first and ask questions later.

I made the Mad Dash after Poppet, looking neither to the left nor to the right in my quest for safety.

Perhaps one day I will unravel the Case of The Mysterious Moving Pillows.

In the meantime, I need a nap!

Goin’ Campin’

                                                                     

                                                                      

    We got a tent!

It is a nice tent, too, with two windows and a sun roof (plus, er, an additional window we sort of added impromptu...see photo)! 

All day long we have spent playing in our tent, dashing in and out, bobbing our heads up through the roof to spy what might be going on in the great indoors.

Because we have had so much fun in our alternate abode, Mummy is letting us have a camp out tonight replete with marshmallows, popcorn and hot chocolate. Yum!

To that end, I have written a little jingle to describe our first night under the stars:

It is called Campin’ Out.

(sung to the tune of Jingle Bells – I am getting excited about Christmas, can you tell?)

Campin’ out,

Campin’ out,

In the kitchen overnight.

Everthing was goin’ swell

‘Til Mummy turned out the lights!

Hey!

Come right back!

Turn on the lights!

It’s awfully dark in here!

I think I’ll go

To bed just now

And camp again next year.

Hey!

Mummy! Wait for me!

*scamper, scamper, scamper*

Fall Decorating

Today I helped Mummy get the house ready for the new season!

 While she was upstairs cleaning out cabinets in Dad’s study (I won’t go into the inconsistency of the rules that say she gets to rummage in there but I don’t), I tackled the basket full of shiny green apples she recently placed in the floor for my convenience. I began the job by pulling the brilliant orbs one at a time onto the floor then rolling them around while clawing and scrabbling with them. But that was taking too long so I finally got smart and just tipped the basket over (I knew that handle had to have a purpose).

With so many fresh smelling apples all over the floor, I couldn’t decide which to work on first so I just rolled them around and chewed on them for a bit. I discovered that if you poke holes in them, juice seeps out, and my paws did get a bit sticky; otherwise, it was much fun.  I got all the apples just where I wanted them - some against the baseboards, others wedged beneath the console. Still others were scattered upside down at odd intervals over the stone tile.

The bruises and puncture marks added instant character, I thought.

Excited for Mummy to see my handiwork, I lay down amongst the Granny Smiths and rested until she (Mummy, not Granny Smith) came back downstairs. As she approached my display, I was bursting with joy at the thought of how pleased she must be that she did not need to worry about decorating the dining room - it was already done! 

At first, Mummy was so astonished all she could say was, “I don’t believe it!” [I know what she means – it really is a masterpiece.] Then she said, in a notably excited tone, that now she was going to have to buy more apples. It appears she really appreciates my decorating skills and is planning on getting me more materials to work with!

I think I have found my calling – Augustus, Decorator Extraordinaire.

Hide and Speak

Does anyone know the rules of that thrilling game of intrigue known as Hide & Seek? 

I am wondering because Mummy says I haven’t quite got the hang of it. 

She says it is a game of secrecy which involves being quiet. I am sure I don’t know what she is talking about. 

Every now and then, Mummy will playfully chase me through the house until I discover a place I just know will be the ultimate hiding spot. Problem is Mummy always finds me! 

I can’t think how she does it. 

Take today for an instance:  

Running fast as I could away from Mummy, I slipped ‘round the corner into the guest bath and dove behind the shower curtain, glowing with confidence because she would never think to look for me in there. And as it seemed to be taking her forever [even better!], I began trilling to myself to pass the time. Next thing I know, she flings the shower curtain back and exposes me! 

I was astonished.

Is she, perhaps, using hidden cameras? Is she psychotic...er, psychic?

 I must get to the bottom of this if I am to win the game someday. 

I must discover her secret! 

I am going to ponder this deep mystery.

“Hum-de-hum-hum-de-hum tum tum…”

JuSh’ a Li'l ‘niP’ll dO Ya!

*sniff…sniff*

*snifF…SniFF…sNIFF**

*SNIIIIIIFFFFFFF*

Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh…

Those wonderful dried herbs, those delightful crushed leaves from heaven~

I am a mad cat, running around in all directions – a positive Feline Frenzy!

Away I go, under the table…

*Screeeeech*

Did that chair just say something to me?

Take that!

*scratch, scuffle, scuffle*

Around the dining room, into the hall, back under the table like a flash I go…

I am falling over, kicking the air, scrAbblinG at a paSsing cat…Wazhn’t therE a CaT? My MishhtAke…

*hiccup*

I am suddenly relaxed, ovErwhelmed by a stRange sense of calM serEnity (izh that redUndant?)

RedoNe-whAt?

*giggle*

Rolling over, I sEe Other cats…thEy are uPsssHide down! I pAw At them lightly bUt tHey aRe sHo fAr…

mUmMy? wHy izH aShpEn pInK?

*SNIFF*

hoO-HOo…

~THisH ish grReEat sHtuff~

*hIcCup*

Evidence!

Mummy is so busted!

She has been sneaking out onto the deck this past couple of weeks and spending too much time with Mithril, one of the outdoor cats. She thinks I don't notice but Mummy has also been spied carrying the One-Eyed Monster (aka digital camera) along for the excursions, and I, being the clever fellow that I am, have rummaged through her office and found the evidence of what I knew to be another disaster in the making –

viz. KITTENS!

Yep, we have newborn kittens in the vicinity, and I am hereby exposing Mummy's fell deeds of oohing and aahing over the little blighters on a consistent basis with intent to upset our happy home life.

Presenting Exhibit A, Mithril and Kits, born August 16, 2012.

As if Mosby and Morgan weren't bad enough....

Fuzzy intruders!

ThWaCk!

Down came the rolled-up magazine immediately behind, causing me to jump not a little and loosening my moorings from the marble tile. I gave Mummy a “What the devil?” look then turned in a circle to get a view of the crash site.

There must be some explanation, I thought. The obvious one aside (Mummy has gone mad) and desiring to extend the benefit of the doubt, surely there was some just cause for her paper-wielding outburst.

What I observed as Mummy raised the homemade swatter was a dazed but menacing-looking eight-legged creature who had apparently been stalking me unawares and who appeared still intent on his evil deed, providing he could first catch the license number of that truck.

 I was astonished!

To think that if Mummy had not been hanging around idly rolling up papers, I might have been an Arachnid Breakfast.

Or at the very least, my wild fur would have become a home for wayward spiders.

*sHudDeR*